Yikes! This aggressive-looking machine is patented under the name “Lightning” and is cold to the touch. Because it’s made from cast iron, when you lift it, its weight drags your whole body down and turns your arm to pudding. It has four gears; each is a different size, and each is necessary. When activated, these gears grind, whip, and spin a single two-pronged fork against a sharpened, diagonally suspended knife.
But the Lightning is not a
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